Stressed Out

June 29, 2010

yeah so, i saw some of my seniors in my college graduated a couple of weeks ago as Political Science Bachelors with an S.Ip degree title attached officially after their names. I feel happy for them because finally they could unleash their soul from the same, boring, o-shit-here-we-go-again reality that they have to face every time they step into the campus building, just like i wish for. so conrgats, I’m happy for you, wish you all the greatest, blablablabla~
I don’t actually know what I’m feeling right now. It’s like I’m making contemplation with myself. like, I do believe that I feel relieved for the seniors that had passed the campus-misery out, but I also feel so envious and greedy much enough to not accept the fact that they have left me first. I mean, I know that they’ve entered this college for like years ago before me. It’s a damn obvious thing for them to be graduated in this period of time while I’m still loafing around with all these bitch exams. call me insolent ass, but hell yeah I enjoy watching seniors sit beside me in the same 2nd semester class. It makes me (the so-average-inclined-to-idiot student) feel like, “great, now I don’t have to be too serious here. for god sake there is a 24 y/o guy learning the same shit for the 2nd (or 3rd) time with me. I’m so going to relax.”
yes I know it may seems douchebag-ly disrespectful for you guys who are completed the earmark of ‘the guy in my class’. I’m so sorry, but I’m trying to be honest here. but once again I’m sorry because I’m afraid of karma.
SHUSH! Let’s cut the crap. the point is, I wanna be those smart and lucky seniors. I wanna get that Toga Clothes and the famous hat immediately. can we just skip these semesters and sleep and wake up knowing that we already have a job and a beautiful famliy? No, we can’t. that’s impossible and lame. We should do the hard work and those things Mario Teguh had been said over and over. Those pretty seniors of mine are the example of the good and ‘the guy in my class’ is the example of the bad. It’s that simple. I don’t care with some idealistic-minded reasons. Those guys who have this sort of personal mission blablablabla so they have to postpone their graduation day for it. Yeah whatever, I support you anyway, and good luck with that. All I wanna do is just to get the knowledge, then get the title, then get the job, the money, and the family. and then die peacefully.
I don’t understand why I sound so shallow-minded in this post. Really, trust me I can take anything from your head and accept it. but perhaps this same, boring, o-shit-here-we-go-again reality drives me crazy! Yeah I’m so sure this is because of my hectic life I’m dealing with right now. I promise you’ll see a different ‘me’ in the next post. A usual open-minded, cheerful, handsome guy you’ve already known :)
p.s. again and again, I’m sorry for all the bad words that might offend you. I’m stressed here! please understand. Thanks.

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